Transgender Regret Is Real Even If The Media Says Otherwise thefederalist.com

Once again, a right-wing rag is the only place one can find stories like this. Whatever you may think of Walt Heyer as a spokesman, his reference to a number of generally ignored clinical studies of less-than-happy trans people is reason enough to read this article.

As a member of the card-carrying left, it would be easy to shoot the messenger (possibly homophobic Heyer) and his far-right platform (The Federalist). But until the mainstream media sees fit to investigate stories like this, it’s all we got.

Apparently transgender lives do not matter: not to the LGBT and not to the media. It’s time for the media to stand up and provide the overwhelming evidence for all to see that mental illness, regret and suicide exist among transgenders. Only then will we see true improvement in the outcomes for all.

I believe that true compassion is shown by raising factual issues, based on scientific research, and having the best minds follow the evidence to provide the best care for this segment of our society that is suffering. Packaging the issue in the wrapper of political correctness or withholding the negative findings is not compassion. Political correctness hinders research and treatment of the medical conditions and muzzles a media that’s willing to participate in a false narrative. Who’s the loser? The transgender who regrets transitioning.

The White House plays politics with a vulnerable part of our population to score points with the LGBT but the risks of regret, suicide and untreated mental issues remain for the transgender population.

never-obey

victoriassecretpolice:

I feel like “TERF” has become synonymous with “people who want to kill and correct trans people”. the transactivists here have literally equated critical analysis by radical feminists into literally stabbing a trans person on the street. and now everyone else thinks that too. the fact that transactivists equate the death of harmful gender norms (what radfem are actually trying to eliminate) with the death of themselves is very telling.

never-obey
My 16-year-old daughter is convinced she needs a sex change | Life and style | The Guardian theguardian.com

The Guardian breaks a taboo and dares to publish an anguished mom’s doubts about daughter’s trans identity. Mom brings up underlying mental health issues, the influence of the Internet, and a painful childhood.  Many of the commenters are predictably unsupportive (this is the Guardian, after all), but I do believe this is a first…


 My daughter, who is 16, has a history of mental health issues. Her father is an alcoholic who left the family home when she was very young; she hasn’t seen him for some years and finds meetings with him upsetting. I am sure that this perceived rejection is at the root of her troubles as she suffers from very low self-esteem. She is overweight and was bullied at school, finally refusing to attend. She has been out of education since she was 12. 

 We have had some input from the Child and Adolescent Mental Health Services (CAMHS), but nothing has helped and she will no longer engage with them. She has never slept well and was prescribed melatonin. Then, last November, she was prescribed medication by a GP for persistent headaches and took a month’s supply in one go. To the family, this was the strongest example yet of her self-loathing and tendency to self-harm, albeit also perhaps a cry for help. 

 Following this, I had a telephone consultation with her psychiatrist, who raised the issue of autism – this has been a concern of mine, as she does display a number of traits associated with autism. However, she is now convinced that she needs a sex change. Given that she has never previously shown any inclination to be anything other than female, it would appear that this is yet another form of self-harm and/or a cry for help. 

 I am worried that because of the amount of time she spends on the internet, she is being influenced to believing her intentions are correct.

She needs someone she respects sufficiently to listen to and open up to, who will dig deep enough to uncover the underlying issues, and help her to resolve them. I feel that, without such help, she will continue down her unhappy path, perhaps pursuing gender-change (without realising that this would not resolve any of her underlying issues), or leading to an even worse conclusion.

journeyintomanhood
Transgender Teen, 18, Undergoes Rare Surgery So He Can Be a Dad One Day yahoo.com

journeyintomanhood:

4thwavenow:

I have profoundly mixed feelings reading this. On the one hand, it’s great that Cole will be able to biologically reproduce someday. On the other, it’s further cementing and normalizing the idea that medicalization is the answer for so many girls and teens who are trying to escape being female.

I’d only wish the best for Cole, and totally understand this decision. But…

I do have to quibble with some of the morphology (in both the linguistic and biological sense), such as the reference to “his” eggs and being “a father” someday. Biological facts are stubborn things: Ovaries are not and cannot be part of a male’s anatomy, and regardless of one’s preferred pronouns or subjective identity, the reality is that Cole will be the mother (not the father) of any future offspring.

When 18-year-old Cole Carman made the decision to transition from female to male late last year, the San Francisco-area teen knew that he would be in for major surgery and hormone therapy.

That didn’t stop Carman, a recent high school grad set to start college in the fall, from signing on for another potentially risky medical procedure: egg retrieval. It’s a fairly routine (yet still major) surgery, typically undertaken by egg donors and some women undergoing in-vitro fertilization.

But Carman may be the first transgender teen to have his eggs successfully harvested before transitioning — preserving his ability to have children that he’ll be biologically related to, whether he chooses to carry a child himself or turn to a surrogate. “I’ve always known I wanted to have kids of my own, so when my endocrinologist talked to me about it, it was a no-brainer,” Carman told Yahoo Parenting.

The surgery, which was done at the end of May, wasn’t so simple. It required 10 days of hormone shots, and it left him dealing with side effects like bloating and cramping. During the procedure, a doctor used a needle to harvest as many egg follicles as possible, freezing them so they can be thawed and fertilized at some point in the future.

What makes Carman’s situation so groundbreaking is that up until recently, doctors didn’t routinely talk about fertility preservation to transgender teens or adults who were planning to transition.

Pretty limited in thinking to believe that biology makes someone a father or a mother. Does this mean that adoptive parents aren’t ever real parents?

That’s a pretty big stretch, to think my pointing out the irrefutable fact of sexual dimorphism means I think people who adopt aren’t “real parents.” Of course they are. 

But the article is about the fact that Cole wants to have biological children. What I said–that ova are female, and that the parent of a child conceived via those ova would actually be the child’s mother–should be no more controversial than saying that ova come from a mare, not a stallion. Sexual dimorphism in the animal kingdom (to which we humans belong) is not an idea subject to identity politics. It is a reality.

journeyintomanhood
Transgender Teen, 18, Undergoes Rare Surgery So He Can Be a Dad One Day yahoo.com

I have profoundly mixed feelings reading this. On the one hand, it’s great that Cole will be able to biologically reproduce someday. On the other, it’s further cementing and normalizing the idea that medicalization is the answer for so many girls and teens who are trying to escape being female.

I’d only wish the best for Cole, and totally understand this decision. But…

I do have to quibble with some of the morphology (in both the linguistic and biological sense), such as the reference to “his” eggs and being “a father” someday. Biological facts are stubborn things: Ovaries are not and cannot be part of a male’s anatomy, and regardless of one’s preferred pronouns or subjective identity, the reality is that Cole will be the mother (not the father) of any future offspring.

When 18-year-old Cole Carman made the decision to transition from female to male late last year, the San Francisco-area teen knew that he would be in for major surgery and hormone therapy.

That didn’t stop Carman, a recent high school grad set to start college in the fall, from signing on for another potentially risky medical procedure: egg retrieval. It’s a fairly routine (yet still major) surgery, typically undertaken by egg donors and some women undergoing in-vitro fertilization.

But Carman may be the first transgender teen to have his eggs successfully harvested before transitioning — preserving his ability to have children that he’ll be biologically related to, whether he chooses to carry a child himself or turn to a surrogate. “I’ve always known I wanted to have kids of my own, so when my endocrinologist talked to me about it, it was a no-brainer,” Carman told Yahoo Parenting.

The surgery, which was done at the end of May, wasn’t so simple. It required 10 days of hormone shots, and it left him dealing with side effects like bloating and cramping. During the procedure, a doctor used a needle to harvest as many egg follicles as possible, freezing them so they can be thawed and fertilized at some point in the future.

What makes Carman’s situation so groundbreaking is that up until recently, doctors didn’t routinely talk about fertility preservation to transgender teens or adults who were planning to transition.

radicalblossoming-deactivated20

radicalblossoming:

4thwavenow:

radicalblossoming:

Like you said - transitioning was SO EASY for me. I was 15 when I came out (2003) and was seeing a trans specialist by the end of the year, prescribed hormones at that same appointment, and scheduling top surgery by early 2004 (at age 16). I’d also been recommended to video conference with Dr. Pierre Brassard in Montreal regarding bottom surgery when I turned 18 and had that video conference assessment with him in late 2004. In under a year I had ticked all the boxes, was changing my name, and “living as” a male all before my 17th birthday. No one ever asked me if I was sure, no one ever suggested therapy or other exploration, it was just “yep yep sounds good mhm you’re trans let’s go”. It was the easiest thing I’ve ever done. It was easier to begin transition than to stop it, honestly.

After eight years (at age 23) I decided to stop because around then I was beginning to learn more about feminism and seeing more about how trans people were treating feminists and also I really wanted to know WHO i was. I was 15 when I came out. There’s no way any fifteen year old knows who they are or what’s best for them. I had no idea who I was or who I could be or who I wanted to be, so I stopped transitioning. I looked long and hard for a therapist who was willing to explore alternatives to transitioning and willing to work with me on body image, self worth, and self acceptance.

I did a lot of fucking therapy, honestly. Like weekly 1-2 hour sessions for two solid years and then every-other-week for another year after that. I did a fucking ton of therapy around trauma, a ton of therapy in regards to healing, and a ton of therapy surrounding accepting myself as i am, as i was put on this earth, and it was honestly the best thing i ever did for myself. transitioning was 100% THE WORST thing i ever did to or for myself.

i’m not someone who’s going to sit here and tell you i ~wouldn’t change it because it made me who i am today~. i wish with my entire heart and soul that  someone had stopped me, that an adult had stepped the fuck in and said i was too young, that i had to look at other options, that i wasn’t mature enough for such a decision. i lost eight years, eight of the best years (15-23) of my youth to complete toxicity and the utter destruction of who i could have grown up to become. i’ll never know who i could have been or what i could have done with my life all those years.

honestly when it comes to adults, like, do what you’re gonna do, but don’t do it without some serious fucking introspective digging with a trained professional first.

Like she says: the adults (that would be me, for one) are the ones who should be responsible for protecting teen girls. Instead, gender nonconforming teenagers get thrown to the trans-specialist wolves. The doctors and gender specialists are adults, too, aren’t they? What the hell are they doing? And why are there no adults ready to pick up the pieces when these young women look for help with detransitioning? 

When I decided to begin detransitioning I met with a handful of therapists explaining my situation and what I was looking to get out of therapy. They all insisted I had internalized transphobia (after eight years of living as trans lol) and that I shouldn’t be denying myself who I was (theeeeeeee irony lmao).

After a lot of searching and meeting I finally found a brilliant therapist who was happy to work with me and I am forever grateful to her, but it was far far harder to get therapy for detransition than it was to do the entire transition process.

It’s absolutely shameful how these “professionals” are failing our young women. Thank you SO very much for your blog, radicalblossoming. You and your sister detransitioners are doing an incredible service.

radicalblossoming-deactivated20
radicalblossoming-deactivated20

radicalblossoming:

Like you said - transitioning was SO EASY for me. I was 15 when I came out (2003) and was seeing a trans specialist by the end of the year, prescribed hormones at that same appointment, and scheduling top surgery by early 2004 (at age 16). I’d also been recommended to video conference with Dr. Pierre Brassard in Montreal regarding bottom surgery when I turned 18 and had that video conference assessment with him in late 2004. In under a year I had ticked all the boxes, was changing my name, and “living as” a male all before my 17th birthday. No one ever asked me if I was sure, no one ever suggested therapy or other exploration, it was just “yep yep sounds good mhm you’re trans let’s go”. It was the easiest thing I’ve ever done. It was easier to begin transition than to stop it, honestly.

After eight years (at age 23) I decided to stop because around then I was beginning to learn more about feminism and seeing more about how trans people were treating feminists and also I really wanted to know WHO i was. I was 15 when I came out. There’s no way any fifteen year old knows who they are or what’s best for them. I had no idea who I was or who I could be or who I wanted to be, so I stopped transitioning. I looked long and hard for a therapist who was willing to explore alternatives to transitioning and willing to work with me on body image, self worth, and self acceptance.

I did a lot of fucking therapy, honestly. Like weekly 1-2 hour sessions for two solid years and then every-other-week for another year after that. I did a fucking ton of therapy around trauma, a ton of therapy in regards to healing, and a ton of therapy surrounding accepting myself as i am, as i was put on this earth, and it was honestly the best thing i ever did for myself. transitioning was 100% THE WORST thing i ever did to or for myself.

i’m not someone who’s going to sit here and tell you i ~wouldn’t change it because it made me who i am today~. i wish with my entire heart and soul that  someone had stopped me, that an adult had stepped the fuck in and said i was too young, that i had to look at other options, that i wasn’t mature enough for such a decision. i lost eight years, eight of the best years (15-23) of my youth to complete toxicity and the utter destruction of who i could have grown up to become. i’ll never know who i could have been or what i could have done with my life all those years.

honestly when it comes to adults, like, do what you’re gonna do, but don’t do it without some serious fucking introspective digging with a trained professional first.

Like she says: the adults (that would be me, for one) are the ones who should be responsible for protecting teen girls. Instead, gender nonconforming teenagers get thrown to the trans-specialist wolves. The doctors and gender specialists are adults, too, aren’t they? What the hell are they doing? And why are there no adults ready to pick up the pieces when these young women look for help with detransitioning? 

radicalblossoming-deactivated20
My Disservice to My Transgender Patients radfemrepost.wordpress.com

 A brave doctor realizes the harm done to patients for whom she prescribed medical transition. Excerpts:

I saw this patient at a youth clinic (patients under 26), and she was usually accompanied by her girlfriend. She had been seen and assessed and started on treatment at the Gender Dysphoria Clinic that ran at the time in a local hospital. I initiated nothing, merely administered the testosterone injections they prescribed.

I watched my patient change: she gained weight and muscle, developed a lower voice, sprouted facial hair, and described increasing sex drive and aggressiveness. I remember feeling comfortable that this patient seemed very grounded and confident, and I did not feel manipulated in our interactions, which helped me feel comfortable to administer the injections.

I saw this patient in the mid or late 1990’s, I don’t exactly remember, and as I recall, she was the first transgendered patient I had seen. I was less than ten years into medical practice and hadn’t been taught anything about transgenderism in medical school. I was young and naive and trusted science. There was no science about transgenderism. What was I to do?

               ******************************

…these experiences…[have] convinced me that most, if not all, transgender patients are not in the wrong body but have mental health problems, problems they believe can be fixed if they get in the right body.

At the beginning of my years of practice, with my youth and inexperience, I thought I had an obligation to follow the patient. Now I believe that I failed these patients, and that I have a superseding obligation to tell the truth to my patients. 

I regret every testosterone injection I gave, every estrogen prescription I refilled, and every time I colluded with my patients in their gender delusion. I regret not speaking up to my colleagues and to my patients, instead giving in to the coercion I felt to go along rather than dare to question. I regret not having had the courage to ask questions to get to the story beneath the gender dysphoria story, to find out why my patients had ever been made to feel there was anything wrong with them in the first place. I want to tell the women that we need them as women, and especially as lesbians; I want to tell the men that no amount of medicalization will make them women…

…That first patient’s composure stands out from my subsequent experiences with transgender patients. Surely it helped her navigate the Gender Dysphoria Clinic. Was she truly of a different nature, or had she, with her relative youth, not accumulated distorting grievances? After finding that card, I tried to look her up. I wanted to ask if she was still grateful for transitioning, if she was still as happy to be living her life as the man she believed she was, if she still believed she was a man. I could not find her, at least not under his name.